me (+5)

Last night was a going away celebration for three of my closest friends (SS, MD, LG). The party was at this excellent Haitian restaurant and lounge, Waid's. We got to put together a list of people who were allowed in without a cover, which made me feel a little bit like a rock star. The DJ was excellent, and while casually sipping my Stella I began to think about what life would be like without my friends here this summer.

Law school creates weird relationships. There is an element of co-dependency to my law school friendships ("How much are you going to study? How much should I study? Will you read my resume? What should I do this summer? Are you going to read your homework for that class? Should I?"). With my close friends, this co-dependency has left the purely scholarly realm and infiltrated my personal life as well ("Should I buy these shoes? Or the purse? Or both? Should I study, and then go jogging, or should I just go jogging and see how I feel? Are red onions better caramelized, or should I just go with the yellow?"). It's actually kind of weird. My theory is that the general climate of law school is the catalyst for this phenomena. There is so much negative reinforcement in law school, that I sometimes feel as though I have become fearful of making my own decisions on the off chance that I will be reprimanded or do something completely stupid -- better to bring someone down with me.

I also feel frighteningly close to my law school friends. Eight of the nine women in my book group were in our first year section together. What this means, for those not familiar with law school in general, is that we spent every single class, studied for every single test, and went to every single extra curricular activity together for an entire year. I would say that this probably amounted to, on average, 9 hours a day of interactive time with my law school friends for an entire school year (this is more time than I spend with my husband).

So, I am really, really close to these friends (is what I am trying to say). These eight women are some of the most awesome, amazing women that I have ever met. All of them are bright, driven, kind, and interesting in unique ways, and, three of them are leaving for the summer (SS for a whopping 8 months). To me, their departures this summer symbolize an end to the wombesqueness that is law school. In a year's time, some of the best friends that I have ever made are going to scatter across the country to pursue life dreams. This summer is just the prologue. My friend SA would say that this is happy because people will follow dreams and live lives and it will be fantastic, but to me, it is mostly sad.

So this is what I thought about last night between Stella's and dancing and gabbing and laughing.